When will this finish...
For the past few years, my life has been on hold. I go to work and do something there but the majority of the time I'm still spending on PhD. It's such an existential trap. It's close to the second year when I'm trying to impress a single person who doesn't really care. It's close to four years when I'm trying to improve some idea that I had and thought that it might work because the previous 3 years gave no results.
When I started the PhD I was motivated, interested in everything and shaking from the excitement that I'll be pushing humanity forward. Now, I just want to do the minimum required. In the hindsight, I've wasted my life. Nothing good is coming from this. Hopefully, that is "yet". December is in or out and, at this stage, I don't really care.